Little tidbits of what I went through:

I am wondering weather it is a full moon today. There was some rather odd behavior about and that would help explain stuff, but not really.

I was attempting to drive to a location. I had probably 3 blocks from said location when part of the weirdness reared it's ugly strange head. I was trying to make a left turn from a signal with a left turn arrow. I got the go ahead arrow, and started to turn left. At the same time, what I believe to be a homeless person on a bike turned right and ended up right in front of me. He wanted to go very slowly (perhaps drunk) and didn't realize I was behind him. (The car is rather quiet running at Idle, which is what I was doing.)



I eventually reached the Parking lot I was after and turned right to get away from the drunk homeless guy on the bike. I reached a blistering 5 MPH, when I got behind a large red SUV. This lady was trying to decide which way she was to go, I believe. Straight or Turn Left. She put on her left turn signal, then went straight any way. Interesting. (This was all taking place in the Parking lot full of parked cars.)

She turned off her signal and proceeded to crawl forward, then at the next turn, decided to go left. Yay! She didn't signal, but I didn't care. I zoomed through the parking lot when I encountered the next odd thing.

This lady was walking betwixt 2 rows of cars having a senior moment trying to figure out where she was parked. When I first saw her she was going straight down the middle of the row, then she walked over in front of My car. Then she walked away from the front of my car, back towards the middle, looking for her car. Again My car in silent mode (Not really) Idiling, waiting for her to decide what the frack she was going to do. Then back in front of my car, then suddenly to the left. I guess she finally found her car, poor dear.





The only problem was she was about 20 years old.


Then during the time spent Walking to the building I was going to, I almost got ran over twice. I was so glad to finally make it inside and in one piece.

Unfortunately, I was 15 minutes late to get done all of what I had started out to do.

If you do not really know of what you speak, it behooves you to either A.) Find out what you are talking about or B.) Shut up and quit talking. Just say you don't know and tell the customer to talk to the Pharmacist. Thank You

So, I then am In my car. Listening to the stereo. This isn't good.

I finally get to where I think I can drive, that is until this truck pulls up along side of me with Loud exhaust.

Wow, that sounds good.

I pull into the next empty parking lot, about 5 blocks from where I had been. Geez!

Some time later I finally get back to the Pizza place and see my boss. He sends me home about 5 and a half hours early.

I was watching NASCAR today, some 18 hours after being in that hallway, amazed at how good those engines sound. I don't think it just pot in that smoke. Who knows what else I was inhaling.

I showed up for work the second day all ready to go. I clocked in and went out on my first delivery.

A piece of cake.

Went back and quickly got sent off on another delivery. Great. Job Security.

I found the location and found a place to park a few yards down the street. It seems like I had delivered Pizza Here many many Moons ago. Seemed vaguely familiar. The front door led to a common hallway that the four apartments inside went off of. The thing that really hit me as I entered into the doorway and the hallway was the amazingly strong odor of burning Hemp.

Mary Jane. Marijuahana. Weed.

Illeagal activity.

Oh my Gawd that is strong. So I find the apartment that I need and I knock on the door.

And I wait. And I breathe in. And I wait. And wait.

Then this young lady opens the door. She had apparently ordered a fair amount of food (Munchies) and I am pulling box after box after bag of food from the inside of this black warming bag. And she has a young child trying to exit the room he is in and enter the smoke filled hallway. She takes a box or a bag and then grabs the youngin and heads him back into the room.

She repeats this process about 5 times. I am still breathing in. Out in the smoke filled hallway. Breathing.

She wants to hand me some money, but I want to give her a total before she does that. I find the total and tell her what it was and she hands me a wad of dough. I tell her to have a good night and turn away from the door. still breathing. Funny, I don't smell the Pot smoke any more. I count the money and stick it into my pocket.

I'm not sure but the door seems a bit different as I open it. Wow, that's odd. I go to walk to my car and notice the oncoming car sounds really really nice. Neato.

Then I get behind the steering wheel and notice my Car Stereo just sounds amazing. It does sound good normally, but this is sounding fantastic.

Wait a minute, I am stoned. Not slightly buzzed, not just feeling good, but like how am I going to drive stoned. I have to drive, so I drive.

About 1 block.

Nope, that's it. Christ, Now I have to do is call my brand new boss and try to explain to him the where's and the why's and the I don't believe this crap type of stuff and Hope he understands and don't fire my butt on the spot.

I get my cell phone out and call. I manage to get past the small echo of my voice coming back to me in my ear for some reason, which really really sounds good. I explain to him, I think, what is wrong. I find him asking me about 3 or 4 times if I am going to be late getting back. I guess I finally answered him. I hang up.

Then for some reason I think it would be a good Idea to call my wife and let her know what is going on. She doesn't answer and I find myself leaving a message of some type on my answering machine, after I stop listening to my amazing voice speaking to me about leaving a message after the beep.

(Cont.)

After a very long hiatus from the delivery of Pizzas, I have officially returned. This company is totally different than the last one I worked for and the times are certainly different.

One big difference is the fact that now there is a Hot Bag that the Pizzas stay in as I walk up to the door. It's a very good idea and keeps the temp pretty constant for the time The Pizza leaves the Kitchen to the time it arrives at the Customers waiting hands.

It also led to a problem at the first customer I had on my first day back at the delivery Job. Part of the problem I had was about 3 fold.

Number 1.) The customer is at the open front door waiting for me and I am only halfway to the door. Normally no problem. This time though, I still had to get answers to questions in my head from the guy riding with me to show me how to deliver pizzas.

Number 2.) The guy that is supposed to be walking up to the door with me to show me how to deliver the pizzas is still down on the street waiting by my car. Normally no problem, but he can't hear the questions I am firing at him as I am walking towards the customers door.

Number 3.) Force of Habit I guess - I hand the waiting customer what I had in my hands, which years ago would have been his food, ready for the eating. Now what I had handed him was a black somewhat flexible cloth bag that resembled nothing of a pizza or the box it was retained in.

The customer says to me as I blindly handed off the Package to Him "I don't want this."

I am looking behind me wondering where my answer man is. He is quickly making his way up the sidewalk, trying to answer me. I turned around to see what the Customer was talking about. I turned to face him, and he hands me back the "package". I am thinking why doesn't he want his pizza, then look down to see the black bag.

"Oh shit." I said to myself, hopefully not out loud.

I found the opening to the Hot bag and opened it up to get his pizza out.

By now, my questions were pretty much mute, since the delivery was pretty much done. The guy hands me a wad of money and says he wants 10 bucks back. No problem normally.

Anyway, you get the picture. Luckily the rest of my night went some what smoother.

But then there was day 2.

(Cont.)